”That’s just what Jesus said!”

Ever notice how some sects of Christianity love to metaphorically slap their thighs and roll about laughing at their Country Cousins the Young Earth Creationists? How they are wont to point at ‘ol Hambo, and his Ark (not me) project and go on and on … and in some cases …. on about how the notion of a global flood as described in Genesis is simply ridiculous, anti-science and thus, seriously embarrassing all science-embracing Christians who are all smart, modern and up to date with plate tectonics rather than those who seem addled with gin and tonics?

Also, a great many of these smart, modern up-to-date Christians sometimes expound in lengthy exposition that, even though the Old Testament contains many examples of supernatural events, to compare a talking donkey or a global flood, for example, to say, curing blindness with spittle and walking on water as found in the New Testament simply means you have a presuppositional stance against the existence of God and the reality of the supernatural. 

Yes, yes. I know how much sense that makes, all right?  You don’t have to point it out. Sheesh! 

As modern, up to date Christians will gladly explain/preach/ apologize how and why as Jesus is God incarnate in the New Testament he … oops , sorry … He is also very much God in the Old.

One can easily see the logic of such a reasoned, well-thought out position, yes? Well, naturally.

So where is all this going I hear you say.

I’m glad you asked.

Let’s look and see what Jesus said about The Flood, shall we?

Matthew 24: 37-39

37 But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. 38 For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, 39 and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be.

And in the Gospel of Luke …

26 “Just as it was in the days of Noah, so also will it be in the days of the Son of Man. 27 People were eating, drinking, marrying and being given in marriage up to the day Noah entered the ark. Then the flood came and destroyed them all.”

Jesus says the flood swept them all away. He knows the Tanakh – as any good Jewish boy would – and, therefore, would have been familiar with this passage: ‘’…. all flesh died that moved on the earth, birds, livestock, beasts, all swarming creatures that swarm on the earth and all mankind.’’

Not some, but all mankind.

There is not a chance in Hades that this could be misunderstood or misconstrued to mean a local flood.

Jesus knew exactly what he was talking about.

Therefore, if Jesus believed and referenced the Genesis tale of Noah, the Ark (not me) and the Global Flood where does this leave science-embracing, smart, modern up-to-date plate tectonic style Christians?

I’ll leave it to you to find the  most suitable phrase. Feel free to express it in the comments! 



22 thoughts on “”That’s just what Jesus said!”

  1. Thinking of yesterdays post, coupled to this one, a really good piece of “evidence” that would convince me would have been Jesus explaining to his fellow Jews that the OT is absolute historical nonsense, and detailing a more accurate cosmogony.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Now that is a very interesting proposition.
      Why don’t you ask Joel or Lee? Joel especially is really clued up on Jesus so I’m sure he would know why!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ve asked others (especially Mel), but none seem to want to even take a stab at it. But it’s a fair point, isn’t it? It’d be bloody impressive, and you’d really have to take pause and say “Wow, that couldn’t have been a lucky guess.”


        1. If it had happened he still would have likely been crucified, but it would also likely have removed the need for faith in this day and age and (by now) helped dismantle every religion across the globe.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Really in all fairness though, Christianity is about obedience, not truth. As evidenced in the Old Testament, the law is completely arbitrary, as God does not even follow his own laws. In other words, it doesn’t matter what the law is, but your obedience or reaction to it. Accordingly, Jesus would not know everything, like calculations or statistics, but was the perfect exemplar of the law.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sorry, Jim, the key that fits in the socket in my back fell out and I am unable to be ‘wound up’ at the moment.

      If Jesus believed in a global flood then every Christian damn well ought to as well.
      Otherwise y’all is goin’ t’ Hell.
      Praise Jesus.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. This is why I’m a Muslim. My religion is founded on truth, science, and solid, provable facts. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna hop on my horse and be teleported into heaven just like my favorite prophet, Mohammad was. $Allahu Akbar$

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Perhaps your flying horse can crap on a few Christians as it passes overhead? You know, as a demonstration of solid ( if somewhat smelly) evidence?


          1. Upon the pope, poo forth a turd,
            From horse on high, flying like a bird.
            Let all red-hatted cardinals
            Be used as equine urinals.
            On bishops, pastors, rabbis, priests
            The diarrhea of flying beasts.
            Let whales themselves take flight, to hit
            The Vatican with tons of shit.
            And if beturded clerics whine
            “Why should this crappy fate be mine?”
            Remind them that a rain of crud
            Still ain’t as bad as Noah’s flood.

            Liked by 3 people

  4. Unfair! Actually using the dude’s own words against him … how rude! You must be a Communist! I am going to play my Chrsitian Privilege Card and get you banned from WordPress! Outrageous!

    (Nice take, Ark (not Hambo’s)!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ark/ are you aware of just exactly how much water there is in the world? The depths of the oceans almost as high as Everest-

    A 10 ft snowfall in Alaska scant from water ABOVE. Can you fathom the waters above and the waters below? just as scripture so accurately presents and how devastating this truth and fact is to science?

    It more. Those who use the word (global flood) have a more egregious error to face.

    The insanity of water gyrating:twirling:moving at insane speed and direction that no one has seen nor ever will experience……. except on paper of course- or in Disney cartoons coupled with wonderful fish eye lending- but you being a camera man should readily admit my points/ and face the music.

    But worldwide water? Ha! I’ve seen water rise from a trickle to ten ft in mere minutes. Imagine 40 days AND nights of non stop action. Yikes.


      1. I’m sure I’ve said before I do not know the age of the earth/ universe/ or creation.

        One must admit though it’s far easier to trace the tracks of an Arctic fox fir a day as opposed to the tracks he allegedly left a million years ago.

        ‘Evidence’ is so subject to the changing whims of they who write the rules.


  6. Don’t forget flat-Earth cosmogony. That’s in the Bible, too — all that “far corners of the earth” stuff — so if Christians don’t accept those scriptural bits, how can they possibly call themselves true believers? Even Ken Ham doesn’t come up to scratch.

    Fortunately, @CrashingBore sets a fine example for his fellow Jesus freaks. If only they were all as zealous as he, instead of trying to compromise on God’s Word.😇

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Little known fact:

    The original draft of the Great Flood ended with the disclaimer “Based on a true story” but that epilogue was inadvertently left out of the final manuscript due to poor editorial oversight. Jesus knew this, of course, but decided it would be more profitable to incorporate it as a pop culture metaphor for his ministry than waste precious time disputing its historical accuracy. Checkmate, atheist!

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Jesus believing in Noah and the flood is rather the tip of the iceberg if you’re trying to poke holes in the beliefs of adherents to the New Testament. What about the virgin birth, the holy trinity, turning blood into wine and flesh into bread, how as a result of being nailed to a cross absolves all believers from their sins, and rising from the dead?

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s