”Jesus is Coming!” You have got to be kidding?

Apparently not.

Over at Wally’s spot he is running a post about the Rapture.

This comment caught my eye. And for all intent and purpose the writer is deadly serious.

As we used to say in the UK . Some mothers do ‘ave ’em

My emphasis.

  1. Amen I’m ready many are not though they need to be ready. MARANATHA! By the way do you have a left behind letter ready for those left behind after the Rapture just wondering I got my letter done.

     


49 thoughts on “”Jesus is Coming!” You have got to be kidding?

  1. Ark, do these people realize that Jesus has been coming back for 2000 years? Jesus claimed the end times would happen before those apostles of his would die. Every generation of most religions has claimed they were in the end times. I do know that for the brief years I was in the SDA they claimed he was coming back any minute. That was over 40 years ago. I watch several channels on christian cults and they all claim now is the end times when Jesus is coming back. Damn, Jesus comes more than a teenager during the height of puberty. Wish I could come back that often…Shucks. Oh shoot I forgot you say your granny reads your posts. 😉😜🤔🤣😂 Hugs

    Liked by 8 people

    1. Exactly Scotty. The apostle Paul encouraged his followers not to marry and have children because the end was expected so soon.
      ‘This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none,’ (1 Corinthians 7:29) ESV

      Of course Christian apologists have found ways to explain these away. The old favourite interpret the Bible literally until it becomes impossible to do so, then interpret figuratively.

      Liked by 3 people

      1. Thank you Peter. It is hard for me to know what parts of scriptures have been distorted to accommodate today. I think I understand and yet so many want to argue it away as you said. Hugs

        Like

  2. A “left behind letter” huh? Even during my years in church, I never heard of such a thing. Not surprising, though. The Christians who believe in the “end times” most definitely look at life differently. And weirdly.

    Liked by 6 people

  3. Ark, are we sure Wally and reality are even occasional acquaintances? I mean really, does Wally understand the basics of reality, can he tie his own shoes or does he have to use the velcro straps sneakers? Hugs

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I’ve written a post-rapture letter. It says the following: “To whom it may concern. The pizza up here in Heaven is grand. Too bad God hates you and didn’t bring you up here to have some with us goody-goodies. Must suck to be you. Hope you’ll like it in Hell, cause that’s were you’re going. $Amen$”

    Liked by 6 people

  5. Hahahahahaha!!! 🤣 That post and their comments are comical to say the least. Umm, have they not gotten the 2,000-year PLUS ancient Memo that said “He’s Already Come & Gone Folks!“??? Then the following… what(?) 800-900+ more memos… of all past 2nd Christ-Comers, many of them alive today screaming the exact same gibberish to their followers!???

    It kind of begs the question: Will the REAL Jebus H. Christmas G-Man PLEASE standup already! LOL 😄

    Liked by 3 people

    1. HA! I just got it figured out! Do you know why the Christians are having such a hard time with us atheists and non-believers? That’s because they got LEFT BEHIND! Bwwaaaahaaaa! All the True Christians™ are already sitting by the throne and endlessly singing and worshipping.

      Liked by 6 people

      1. @Nan–and you realize, those left behind are going to be so pissed because, as usual, it’s “all our fault”. ( they remind me of my mother in SO many ways…)

        Like

    2. And if these people are so freaking JACKED & JUICED UP about their long long awaited Rapture, why don’t they just behave like radical militant Muslims do for their identical Rapture and blow themselves up… if they’re in such a hurry!? 🤔🙄😒 Do the human race and planet a great favor! LOL

      Liked by 5 people

    3. Go ahead, Laugh! You’ll see when he’s rupturing and your ass is on fire. You’ll be begging Lazarus for water while he’s is a sloppy hug with Abraham.

      Liked by 3 people

        1. Methinks it was retard-ant that got us in to this mess. Or epilepsy…god is mysterious how he can use the weak and frail to trick the weak and frail. Out of love, of course.

          Liked by 1 person

      1. Remember the scene in Independence Day when all those nutters climbed to the top of that skyscraper and that stupid woman had the sign that read:
        ”Take Me!”

        Nobs, one and all.

        Like

  6. Imagine sitting down and nutting out a letter for the sinners in your family or whoever is left on Earth because you are convinced you will be elevated into the heavenly world of God in the very near future where you will be sitting with him, serving him his cup of tea or having plenty to eat with him at the table or in your own room. Evidently you will have food and a room of your own according to the holly words.

    I cannot think of anything more crazy, I wonder did this guy also think about life insurance and a will? Did he write dear atheist family member repent your sins and come and join me in paradise?

    Liked by 7 people

  7. The thing about the rapture is that it is very questionable Biblical Exegesis. It only became sort of mainstream when Pentecostalism became popular (the crazy branch of the Christianity).

    Dr Martyn Lloyd-Jones (a well respected figure in conservative Christianity) maintains that the first time it was taught was in the early 19th century, so it is not exactly church tradition.

    Liked by 4 people

  8. Ye gods … are they still into The Rapture?

    I first came across it (I think) about forty years ago, and I’m sure it’s been around longer than that (I’ll ask … Mister Google knows everything).

    They even use to quote at each other their unthinking bumper sticker:

    “IF I’M RAPTURED, TAKE THE WHEEL”

    Liked by 3 people

  9. Wally must have gotten the secret decoder ring on the Voynich manuscript. Now he knows something no one else can decipher. Post rapture letter? I have two. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!

    Liked by 2 people

  10. The only thing left behind is these people’s minds. Actually they never had any to begin with.
    I wonder if Jim Jones had his flock write any rapture letters before they drank the koolaid.

    Liked by 4 people

  11. One of the best yet Ark! You don’t half unearth some crackers (xmas pun in there somewhere)
    Reminds me of the old guy back in the 70’s who used to walk up and down outside Carrow Road with the ‘End of the world is nigh’ sign, wonder what happened to him?

    Liked by 3 people

  12. Got this somewhere….

    A view of heaven

    Christianity holds out its ultimate reward, eternal life in heaven, like an apple on a stick and claims that it and only it can provide this treat to you. It is a poisoned apple. Consider the possibilities.

    In heaven, there will be no imperfections, nothing to fix, nothing to improve, nothing to strive for. There will be no comeback stories, no falling in love, no making up after breaking up. There will be no hunger, no one in danger, no one in need, so there will be no satisfaction of helping someone. There will be nothing to tear down, nothing to maintain, and nothing to build. There will be no need to exercise and no need for food or drinks, your spiritual body will be able to exist without them.

    There will be no golf courses, no bowling alleys, no baseball or NFL. There will be no movies, no pornography, no gambling, no practical jokes, no white lies, and no raucous comedians.

    There will be nothing to complain about, no tragedies, no death, no disease, no injuries, and no dirty messes. There will be no jobs, no money to manage, no elections, no judges, no courts, no marriages, no wedding cakes, and no funerals.

    There will be no aging, everyone will be the same age and in generally the same healthy dimensions, and it will seem strange that your grandfather and your grandson seem more like your brothers. There will be no shopping, no investing, no job interviews, no planning for the future. In fact, the future will be meaningless since nothing really changes.

    There will be no pills to take, no vitamins, no doctors to see, and no need to even sleep. Those things are just a remnant of our nasty earthly existence.

    And since Jesus confirmed in Luke 20:34-36 that there will be no marriage in heaven, it is a safe bet that there will be no sex there as well.

    So for 1,000,000,000,000,000 years and beyond, what will you do? Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, fifty-two weeks a year, year after year, forever and ever, you will sit in a church praising your jealous and ego-centered god, who made you and specifically selected you to be his devoted slave. Think about it.

    Liked by 2 people

  13. Wow, do you think the Left Behind “I told you so” letters will achieve the cultural status of say, a “Dear John letter”? I imagine books could be written collecting the things and we all could have a good laugh. I wonder what the reaction would be if the “raptured” ended up teleported into a Lake of Fire, just for a few seconds, before a booming voice says “Just kinning!”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wonder how many has a PS that informed their nearest and dearest that:
      ”I left the stove on, please switch it off before you go to Aunt Ethel’s place. Hope to see you all soon.
      Reg.”

      Like

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